Thursday, March 13, 2008

Why Homeschool?

This is not going to become a blog about Homeschooling, unless the Lord leads it that way, because I feel there is just so much support, resource information, and testimonies to keep us busy for a lifetime!

But this is about my journey in Him, and I've found another step in the path that He is leading me.

My deepest prayer has been "Less of me, Lord, More of You". There is still so much of ME. There is so much that I still hold on to, that I think I've surrendered, but I find myself still holding on to, and it's sooo heavy.

I have a little bookmark made with a string and a couple of beads. On one end is a transparent bead, and inside are little flecks, like bubbles that glow in the dark. These flecks don't stop glowing the whole night! Every time I see this bead (it's in my Bible as a bookmark), I cry out in my heart to Him, to make me so transparent, that only Jesus through the Holy Spirit in me will shine through. That there will be no more Jenni in the way, just Him - and people can see Him, and He gets all the glory! I want to be just like that bead!

So what has this got to do with Homeschooling? Well, my husband (Dion) and I know the Lord has called us to do this since Shandon (now 10) was 4 years old. But I knew there was just no way I was willing to give up my "freedom" and have my children around me 24/7. I was just too selfish to even consider more than just a passing thought that maybe this is His Perfect Plan for us and for our boys.

So the Lord quit calling, and I quit asking.
Until now.

Now that I am getting deeper into Him, wanting more of Him, and telling Him that no matter what it takes to get there, I will be obedient because I am so desperate for Him.

So here's my next step in my journey with Him. To be obedient to His Call.
Yes, this is the best option for our boys, but why would He specifically direct me to do homeschooling? I'm sure I'm going to mess up big time, unless I keep my hand firmly tucked in His, and stay on my knees pretty much most of the time!

Well, last night, through one of my Homeschooling forums, I discovered a website by one of the members called Revived Christian Women which has answered so many of my questions!
What a perfect way to learn to die to self! I really encourage any woman (even men!) to get into Linda's teachings on her site. It is not only for homeschooling, but has some really deep insight to our walk with Him as our Heavenly Father, and the Perfect Parent.

Father, may You be the One to teach me, to guide me, to direct my path. May You become more in me, and me become less, that You may be glorified, that You would be able to use me for Your Kingdom. I love You Lord. Teach me to love You More.

In Love